Saturday, August 31, 2019

Ma

you are a work of art,
the celestial individual that vibrated with the desire for life,
to enjoy that which you earned
that which you fought for
that which you were willing to spit into the face of God for;

and for that you never were,
but you were and you did!
you existed and were mother to any and all that needed it,
daughter to any and all for whom you could share a space with,
wife only to one, my father,
who in your absence is still whole
and yet missing his half which completed him.

you are the resilient cry of war,
having been bred and raised in war;
you are the translucent made solid
with the childbearing hips which carried me,
carried your daughter,
and carried the daughter that came before that who lived for just long enough for you to desire her

and in the void that was the absence of her laughter her smiles her physicallity,
you filled that love into my sister's and mine's cup
until it runneth over.

you completed the puzzle of the household you built with your man,
and now we find ourselves empty of vitality
but we will find it again --
for that is your legacy;

the triumphant swan song of those who yearn and search and find and succeed.

I miss you dearly and fondly and eternally, Mother.

I hope you see your father again, for, despite all of his mistakes and his transgressions, helped form you

the woman who filled more space
than the void that you now leave behind.

Rest at peace, Ma,
for we will meet again and I will tell you all about the things i did the things that I saw,
things that you were never allowed or knew how to dream about, but that because of you,
I am able to live.

goodnight and goodnight.

Friday, September 14, 2018

Tuesday, October 10, 2017

have you heard the sounds of ocean- liners against the derailing cacophony of plymouthean waves? i was once but a mere student of all, but all was too much for such a simple-ton and temptation led me to become godlike in a manner that led to delirium -- delicious and lascivious.

"i want what i want when i want it"
as of this moment, i want you: now. i want you un-burden'd by clothes or morality; i desire you lustful and tempt'd --
for truth

for enigmatic translucent epiphets
that loosen the pressure of your legs

for vile mis
understandings that lead to volominious arguments that culminate in temper tandrums deflated by the promise of bawdy transgressions against godalmighty

for aromatic evenings in which you are not you and i am not i and the w-hole hubbub is merel-y fragrance in frenetic cache

for erronious depictions of what tomorrows and tomorrows and tomorrows promise in lilted tongue and broken speech

for broken disjoint'd sessions of love-making made with a strong absence of love

Monday, January 2, 2017

Reading List 2017




January

01 – 07            The Curtain: An Essay in Seven Parts | Milan Kundera
08 – 14            Between the World and Me | Ta-Nehisi Coates
15 – 21            A Field Guide to Getting Lost | Rebecca Solnit
22 – 28            The Blind Assassin | Margaret Atwood

February

29 – 04            The Ways of White Folks | Langston Hughes
05 – 11            Nausea | Jean-Paul Sartre
12 – 18            A Brief History of Seven Killings | Marlon James
19 – 25            We Should All Be Feminists | Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

March

26 – 04            The Abortion: An Historical Romance 1966 | Richard Brautigan
05 – 11            We | Yevgeny Zamyatin
12 – 18            Malinche | Laura Esquivel
19 – 25            Bastard Out of Carolina | Dorothy Allison

April

26 – 01            Demons | Fyodor Dostoevsky
02 – 08            Demons | Fyodor Dosoevsky (cont’d)
09 – 15            Wide Sargasso Sea | Jean Rhys
16 – 22            Telex from Cuba | Rachel Kushner
23 – 29            Eight Mortal Ladies Possessed | Tennesse Williams

May

30 – 06            Mr. Potter | Jamaica Kincaid
07 – 13            3 Lives | Gertrude Stein
14 – 20            Hot Water Music | Charles Bukowski
21 – 27            To the Lighthouse | Virginia Woolf

June

28 – 03            Nightwood | Djuna Barnes
04 – 10            The God of Small Things | Arundhati Roy
11 – 17            Blow-Up and Other Stories | Julio Cortazar
18 – 24            Jim Crow’s Devil | Marlon James

July

25 – 01            The Devil and Ms. Prym | Paolo Coelho
02 – 08            White Teeth | Zadie Smith
09 – 15            Madame Bovary | Gustave Flaubert
16 – 22            Giovanni’s Room | James Baldwin
23 – 29            When Things of the Spirit Come First | Simone de Beauvoir

August

30 – 05            The Sheltering Sky | Paul Bowles
06 – 12            Switch, Bitch | Roald Dahl
13 – 19            The Vagina Monologues | Eve Ensler
20 – 26            Practicalities | Marguerite Duras

September

27 – 02            Play It as It Lays | Joan Didion
03 – 09            Tropic of Cancer | Henry Miller
10 – 16            Hope in the Dark | Rebecca Solnit
17 – 23            Justine, or Good Conduct Well Chastised | The Marquis de Sade
24 – 30            Cannery Row | John Steinbeck

October

01 – 07            Invitation to a Beheading | Vladimir Nabakov
08 – 14            Men Without Women | Ernest Hemingway
15 – 21            Wise Blood | Flannery O’Connor
22 – 28            The King in Yellow | Robert W. Chambers

November

29 – 04            The King in Yellow | Robert W. Chambers (cont’d)
05 – 11            Invisible Man | Ralph Ellison
12 – 18            Invisible Man | Ralph Ellison (cont’d)
19 – 25            The Cocktail Party | T.S. Eliot

December

26 – 02            Black Boy | Richard Wright
03 – 09            Everything Beautiful Began After | Simon Van Booy
10 – 16            The Temple of the Golden Pavilion | Yukio Mishima
17 – 23            Their Eyes Were Watching God | Zora Neale Hurston
24 – 30            A Christmas Carol | Charles Dickens

31 – CONGRATULATIONS!





Friday, December 30, 2016

A Study In Memory

i maynot be able
to

help you forget -- but,
i can help
you

replace:

mem-
ories dreams
love-
s hopes

just as youcannot help me
forget

but you have started
to helpme

re-
member

Monday, July 18, 2016

Green and Emerald

if orangeries would only, but then again why wouldnot

they -- i heard
your fragrance whisp'r'd along
the un-blossom-d organdies and
decay'd cherrie blossomss
and just like that;
when has summer ever depriv-
d us of God? or Sex (for that matter[s])
?
one is as Lavender'd as the other.

i painted you all in an acrobatic blue, but i
knew the difference; after so many affairs

only i could. do you
see mypoint...
do you still faultme for having
offered you

greenandemerald
castles? it
was
innocent (i swear)

but the end is all one
as orangeries are,

but, honestly
why wouldnot they?

Wednesday, June 8, 2016

A Reflection on Passion

To contemplate the vibrations of waves hitting shore, I must pause
contemplat
-ing the first time I press'd
my fingers
     into your goosebump'd skin
and you held on;

you taught me how to take a deep breath
make
-ing it last
longer than a sum
mer sunset.
Do you hear the waves?
Do you hear the sirens?

They are gasping for oxygen they don't need, and yet
what is more coveted than
That which is not for us?
Not for me?